Education Humor

I thought a little education humor would serve us well today. I hope you enjoy them.

A little girl came home from school and said, "Mommy, I was punished for something I didn't do in school today."

The mother replied, "That's terrible! I'll have a talk with your teacher about this. What was it you didn't do?"

The little girl answered, "My homework."

The earth-science teacher was lecturing on map reading.

After explaining latitude, longitude, degrees, and minutes, he said, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude; tell me about our lunch.

After a confused silence, a voice piped up, "We're all still in the classroom and you're eating lunch alone."

Teacher to first-graders: "If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another dollar, how many dollars would you have?

Vincent's hand went up quickly. "One dollar," he said.

"You don't know your arithmetic," said the shocked teacher.

"You don't know my father," replied Vincent.

A first grade teacher collected well-known proverbs. He gave each child in the class the first half of a proverb and asked them to come up with the rest. Here are some of the answers:

People in glass houses shouldn't...run around naked.

Better to be safe than...punch a 5th grader.

Strike while the...bug is close.

It's always darkest before...daylight savings time.

Never underestimate the power of...termites.

You can lead a horse to water but...how?

Don't bite the hand that...looks dirty.

No news is...impossible.

A miss is as good as a...Mr.

You can't teach an old dog...math.

If you lie down with dogs, you...will stink in the morning.

Love all, trust...me.

The pen is mightier than...the pigs.

An idle mind is...the best way to relax.

Where there is smoke, there is...pollution.

Happy is the bride who...gets all the presents.

A penny saved is...not much.

Two is company, three is...The Musketeers.

None are so blind as...Helen Keller.

Children should be seen and not...spanked or grounded.

If at first you don't succeed...get new batteries.

You get out of something what you...see pictured on the box.

When the blink lead the blind...get out of the way.

 and my favorite...

 There is no fool like...Aunt Edie.

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